Parmesan-Herb Bread Pudding

I was flipping through the channels the other day and caught the opening sequence of Anne Burrell's Secrets of a Restaurant Chef. In it, she described what she'd be making that day and her herbed bread pudding caught my eye. 

You see, I have been a bread pudding fan for many many years. Sweet or savory, I love 'em. Reading the recipe online brought to mind the sinfully delicious cheese souffle that my friend Paul makes from time to time.  I freaking love that souffle.

So, without further ado, here's my version of this rich deliciousness.

Pantry Fish Cakes

Working in a grocery store has given me ample opportunity to muse on various food items, recipes and general merriment in the kitchen. In fact, a good 80% of my work day consists of me daydreaming about what I can make when I get home, my next day off, and/or when I wake up the next day. (I currently work overnights stocking the grocery shelves at the local Wal-Mart. Trust me, my brain is not at all required for anything more than making sure I don't eviscerate myself with a box cutter.)

This daydreaming, however, can get downright weird.

Case in point, recently I have asked myself, on multiple occasions, what WOULD one do with a can of salmon? I ask myself this for two reasons. One, I LOOOOOVE salmon. Two... I absolutely cannot afford salmon. Remember, I bought a meat package. Splurging on more protein at over twice the price just isn't fiscally wise. In fact, it's just dumb. So I daydream about salmon... cheap salmon.

Now, it was immediately apparent that my go-to "sear-on-stove, finish-in-oven" preparation for fresh salmon was inadequate for this particular variant of my favorite seafood. I'd need to think of something new.

In my multiple hours of musing on this particular topic (yeah... I get bored) I had a brief epiphany when I remembered this recipe that I bookmarked months ago when I was daydreaming about a future wherein I COULD afford fresh salmon.

Upon further reflection, I decided that the salmon in the can probably has a decidedly different texture from that of fresh salmon. I imagined the salmon in the can to be more like tuna in a can (as they are both canned fish, I believe this constitutes a wild intuitive leap). I still thought I could make something tasty, even though I'd be straying far from what most people would call a "burger".

And here we are, after several days of mentally writing and re-writing a recipe in my head, I hit on one final dilemma.

Country Style Pork Ribs Pastoral

First off, I want to apologize. I have been cooking quite a bit for the past month, but have neglected to post a thing. This is partially because I have been going back through and revisiting old recipes. This is primarily due to the fact that I have been too lazy to bother taking pictures. Sometimes video games leech all semblance of ambition from my soul.

Fortunately, my ambition was recently bolstered by the Friends & Family Market here in Ellsworth. This fantastic store is a combination gas station, corner store, produce market, deli and butcher. The butcher offers meat packages at a discount. For $30, I completely stocked my freezer with this...

I told my sister that it felt like Christmas in April, unwrapping all of these delightful packages.  Her response... "It's Meatmas."

Meatmas indeed.

In the lower left of the above picture there is 2.5 lbs sweet italian sausage. Along with that came:

3 lbs. boneless, skinless chicken breasts

2 lbs. boneless pork country spareribs

2 lbs. chuck stew beef

Some other options for this meat package were:

• 2 lbs. london broil steak
• 2 lbs. bottom round roast
• 2 lbs. beef cube steak
• 3 lbs. pork sirloin cutlets
• 2 lbs. italian meatballs
• 2 lbs. slab bacon
• 5 lbs chicken thighs

And many many more. At various price points, you can pick 4 - 18 different selections from the list. As you can imagine, I'm already planning my next package... though I won't need one for another two months at least.

In homage to my mother, I separated and re-wrapped individual portions of everything to make "freezer shopping" all that much easier.

Of all of my selections, the only one I had never cooked before were the pork spareribs. Unfortunately, the internet falls woefully short on imaginative recipes for this particular cut of meat.

Faux French Apple Tart

I bought an apple at the grocery store today with the express intent of making this. It's loosely based on Ina Garten's French Apple Tart that I saw her make on television this afternoon.

Instead of making my own dough in my imaginary food processor (I'll admit that I get a little bit peeved at Ina for using hers for practically every recipe,) I used my good old dessert standby: Pepperidge Farm Puff Pastry.

The great thing about frozen puff pastry is that you can pull a sheet out of the freezer, let it thaw, cut off how much you want, and then re-freeze the rest. For this one person dessert, I cut off a piece just slightly larger than a 3x5 index card.

Quinoa-Black Olive Cakes

I may have mentioned a big bag of white quinoa that we have sitting in the kitchen.

Well, I finally found a recipe that I wanted to try.

It's delicious. Now, I usually cut recipes down when I'm making them for myself. In the future, I will probably do so with this one too...

Our mixing bowl situation in this house is, shall we say, sparse. So I mixed up the "batter" in this baking dish and realized that (thank goodness) I did not have to cook up all of these at once. I can actually pop the remainder in a tupperware and have the makings for quick, filling, vegetarian superfood cakes any time.

Did I mention that these were delicious?

Nana's Stuffed Peppers (Ham only, without rice).

I'm an idiot.

Sometimes I get an idea in my head and it swirls and gurgles and sits like a stagnant pond. This particular idea wouldn't go away, because it occurred to me every time I went grocery shopping.

It goes something like this:
Sausage is delicious.
Sausage is expensive.
I should buy a meat grinder.

Yeah, a fuckin' meat grinder.

Now, normally I can hold these spastic musings at bay. But then I got my tax return. My silly idiot mind started saying things like, "let's just see what Wal-Mart has in the way of small meat grinders," and, "maybe Amazon has something cheap but effective."

And the most insane one of them all, "Think of all the things I could make!"

Starfrit Manual Meat Grinder

Like I said, I'm an idiot.

Idiot like a FOX.

Bonus Post - The Poor Man's Latte

From time to time, I'll wander through our kitchen and notice leftover coffee sitting in the coffee pot. It's cold and probably stronger than anyone wants it to be. I hate, hate, hate pouring this coffee down the sink. I'm also not a huge fan of pouring this coffee down my gullet, either.

This is how I reconcile the situation.

Take a big coffee mug. Pour in 1/4 cup of milk and however much sugar you normally put into a cup of coffee. (Black coffee drinkers, pour the damn coffee down the sink and make a new pot.)

If all you have is skim or 1% milk, add a healthy splash of half & half or heavy cream. Microwave the mug on high for 1 minute and 30 seconds (or until the milk heats up enough that some of the fat floats to the surface in the form of foam, but not so long that it boils over and makes a mess of the microwave.)

Fill the mug the rest of the way with the old, cold coffee.

Stir and Enjoy.